Here’s a common problem; NEGATIVITY.
We wake up in the morning and our minds hardly embrace the new day. Our minds racing of thoughts from yesterday, the day before or even further back. We desperately try to figure out what went wrong so we can hopefully fix it and move on with our day; however, we get so stuck trying to figure it out we miss out on what’s in front of our faces. It’s easy to look in the mirror and still see the mistakes we made years ago. Our ability to think and imagine is so powerful yet we use to it focus on mistakes. Instead of seeing the health we have in front of us we only see the poor health choices we made in the past. Instead of seeing the beautiful opportunities to create happiness and harmony in our relationships today we can only see the regrets of past arguments.
Why do we have negative thoughts?
Negativity is like a little critic we carry around inside of our heads, constantly pointing out our faults, where we have gone wrong and how we will never fix it. The worst part about negativity is it can begin to feel like a force we have no control over. Big or small negativity is really there trying to tell us something. In every case, negativity comes from the past. We carry with us negativity when we suppress and avoid our emotions in the first place. It is Brad Blanton who says “all stress is due to lying.” What he means by this on a basic level is that when we attempt to be anything other than what we are; sad, angry, or even happy, we eventually lose that experience and it becomes a suppressed in our minds. We get trapped in our minds about the way things should be instead of allowing things to be as they are. This is basic lying. Lying about your emotions and the facts. The truth is, there is nothing wrong with feeling any way, unless you say it’s wrong. Negativity is the consistent and disabling mind-set of not dealing and accepting things and feelings as they are. We become so afraid of our emotions and highly confused. Sadness is not a mind-set, it is an emotion that when dealt with and accepted actually goes away really quickly. And even more so, can bring a great deal of light on a situation you may have been trying to figure out. My point is, these so called “negative” emotions can be very useful if we use them and not let them use us.
Working Through Negativity in The Mind
In order to work through negativity permanently you are going to need to cultivate keen awareness for the negativity itself. Below are some steps for doing just that.
- You face the negativity- Look negativity in the face! If you want it to go away you have to chase it down otherwise it will be chasing you forever. Stop avoiding negativity and eventually it will have no place to reside in you. It will simply pass through the mind and you can use it toward your advantage.
- You listen to what the negativity is trying to tell you- Once you have become aware of negativity and can openly admit you are feeling it and that it is okay next you get to ask yourself some questions. What is this negativity trying to tell me? Should I change something? What would you (negativity) suggest I do instead?
- You understand and FEEL what is inside of you- Get back into your body. Your mind is what’s creating this mess in the first place. When you get the first two steps down you can eventually get back into the body and out of the mind. Do you feel negativity in your stomach? Does your body hurt? Do you have less energy flowing through you? Search for the physical sensation so you can begin to work the negativity out through your physical body. Performing exercises like deep belly breaths, smiling, dancing, and stretching all help release that negative energy and replace it with new healthy energy again.
- You send the negativity away and resolve it– By this point you are completely in control of the negative and are not only doing things mentally about it but you are physically using your body to send it away. Perhaps I sound insane at this point but we all know the power of a hug, kiss, sex, and laughter. These physical actions when combined with the intention to resolve and send away negativity can be even more healing.
- You apologize to others as needed- Forgive whoever might be involved in the negative emotions and mindset. Your life is made up of relationships so chances are there is someone or multiple people involved in this. Do not keep shying away from bringing up your truth and remain locked away in your head. The incredible thing about the truth is the intense level of intimacy it brings. Speak your truth and apologize, not even for the other person, but for yourself.
- You celebrate a new self that no longer needs the negativity– This is important for bringing everything full circle. Awarding yourself is healing in two ways. First of all you have sealed the deal and are teaching the mind you have accomplished your goal. Celebration symbols both death and birth. Death to negativity and birth to a more free self. Secondly, the more you can begin to award yourself; as you should, the more negativity will disappear from your life in the first place. We spend so many countless hours going through the things we failed at giving zero attention to our MANY success; waking up each day, feeding our bodies, learning to read or write, arriving to school or work safely, brushing our teeth, knowing how to drive, and so on and so fourth. At one point in time, the many things we take for granted were only wishes and dreams that we never fully celebrated. So begin TODAY celebrating all the little things that were not such little things once.
With deep love,